tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post2194493771298478591..comments2023-10-25T05:30:54.507-04:00Comments on Oh Get A Grip!: The Mook in MeAshe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03390519279886657608noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-34928383730892382352010-12-09T21:24:57.624-05:002010-12-09T21:24:57.624-05:00Lisabet and Anny
Thanks for reading my stuff. So...Lisabet and Anny<br /><br />Thanks for reading my stuff. Sorry to get so heavy. Anyway Lisabet,you know me. I get like this sometimes. And you;re right Anny, except sometimes even when you want to choose happiness, its elusive. There's stuff getting in the way that's hard to fix. I'll get there.<br /><br />GarceGarceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-5742472202471936842010-12-09T14:03:41.917-05:002010-12-09T14:03:41.917-05:00Yes, this was a painful post to read--perhaps as p...Yes, this was a painful post to read--perhaps as painful for you to write. And yet...I suspect you already know deep in your heart that your chosen path is wrong.<br /><br />Happiness is not something you are given. It is not something you earn. It is not something you work for. <br /><br />Happiness is something you choose for yourself. No one can do it for you. <br /><br />I hope you will give yourself the gift of happiness. It's just waiting on the edge of your life for you to take it.anny cookhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03769733659120481918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-66028301133842676642010-12-08T23:03:10.851-05:002010-12-08T23:03:10.851-05:00Garce -
Can't you see that your questions, yo...Garce -<br /><br />Can't you see that your questions, your struggles with yourself, are the essence of authenticity? You're not willing to accept easy answers. You suffer for truth. These things are real, honest, faithful. I don't know anyone who's trying as hard as you to make sense of his own life and his feelings. If that is not authentic than I don't know what is.<br /><br />As for the Object of your Mook, you've got to let her go. For the sake of your own peace of mind, maybe your sanity. You cannot penetrate the truth about someone else's life by Googling them. You are being self-indulgent, allowing yourself this kind of envy. And perhaps somewhat self-destructive. <br /><br />You posit that one must make a choice between a meaningful life and a happy life. That is, if you will pardon my language, bullshit. Life does not have to be full of suffering in order to have some sort of exalted "meaning". The most spiritually advanced among us _are_ happy. Consider the Dalai Lama. Living a happy, fulfilled, generous life is an accomplishment by itself.<br /><br />I know that it is easy for someone on the outside to glibly advise you. I know that it's not that easy to let go of darkness - it's very seductive. But I beg you, out of respect and love - let go. Love yourself as you love others.<br /><br />Lisabet<br /><br />P.S. When I mooted this topic, I knew that you would dig deep to respond. Just don't languish in your hole.Lisabet Saraihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05162514190572269660noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-8950539989165715052010-12-08T17:13:49.484-05:002010-12-08T17:13:49.484-05:00Hi Mike and Kathleen;
I don;t think I've ever...Hi Mike and Kathleen;<br /><br />I don;t think I've ever approached the comments box with more dread than this time around. This is probably the hardest blog I've made here. It just came at such a difficult time. The comparison to the mirror of Erised (Desire) in Harry Potter is exactly right, either that or the picture of Dorian Gray. <br /><br />Its not that I don;t mean it, I mean every word I wrote here. Its just I look at it, and there's so much blood on the page it starts to scare me. I'm going through something really difficult right now, but i need to get through to the other side and try to understand it. Sometimes I'm afraid i might be going crazy like my mom. There's something going on I need to fix. And soon. I can;t keep posting stuff like this, its hard to write, and probably unplesant to read.<br /><br />I understand about giving up on god, Mike, and that the fact you want a goddess instead of the Old Testament god, I understand that too. I think anyone who takes god seriously either ends up giving up on god or going through a period of being really angry at god. MAybe both.<br /><br />And yes, you;re right Kathleen, I know I'm making a mistake looking back on that person, seeing what I think I lack in myself. It just points the way, I need to make a change.<br /><br />GarceGarceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-51003791661327637482010-12-08T09:31:25.850-05:002010-12-08T09:31:25.850-05:00I've always believed that happiness is a consc...I've always believed that happiness is a conscious choice. I'm not sure what you get from projecting perfection on that friend, other than your own misery. But it seems to me that there's not a finite amount of joy, happiness, success, etc. and that even if she does have it all, that in no way changes what you have. It's all in how you chose to look at it.Kathleen Bradeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06347913255760493335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-76376917939662158042010-12-08T07:18:15.894-05:002010-12-08T07:18:15.894-05:00Hi Garce,
this post is painfully honest. I value ...Hi Garce,<br /><br />this post is painfully honest. I value this in a writer<br /><br />Do you remember the Mirror of Erised in Harry Potter? I think Google is becoming your Mirrir of Erised. I think you need to step away from it. I don't think you are cut out for mookdom.<br /><br />For me, fidelity is measured by the choices that we make. You are choosing to be faithful to your family and to your writing. You sre choosing to try to fly but not to flee.<br /><br />I know it must hurt to have the thing that you think is most authentic in your life as a secret but I'm glad you understand that at least you have it.<br /><br />I gave up trying to believe in a God a long time ago. If I could make up a God, she would be human enough to understand pain and sorrow and Godly enough to care but not to want to erase all woe and leave me to a bubble-wrapped life. I would ask one thing of her, the grace to get through it all, the grace not to give up, the grace to continue to love myself and others.<br /><br />I know my fairy god-mother god does not exist, so I look for other sources of grace.<br /><br />Writing like this is one of them<br /><br />Thank youMike Kimerahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18002309169478171450noreply@blogger.com