tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post3729217660922535506..comments2023-10-25T05:30:54.507-04:00Comments on Oh Get A Grip!: Achievement UnlockedAshe Barkerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03390519279886657608noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-10273201790957729782014-10-27T15:52:26.495-04:002014-10-27T15:52:26.495-04:00Heh, I do that also. :)Heh, I do that also. :)Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-36495651014368795932014-10-25T10:46:37.067-04:002014-10-25T10:46:37.067-04:00In fiction, we have to make the plot tie up in a n...In fiction, we have to make the plot tie up in a neat package at the end to make sense of the story. Life doesn't work that way, and those who expect a smooth, unbroken trajectory will be severely disappointed. Daddy Xhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12927663248424944119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-75641071556313419322014-10-25T10:07:06.841-04:002014-10-25T10:07:06.841-04:00Despite my ostensible focus on enjoying what I'...Despite my ostensible focus on enjoying what I'm doing, there's a knee-jerk mindset I have on some level that's oriented toward "accomplishing" the enjoyable "task." For example, I'll be in the middle of reading a book that's delighting me, a book that in one sense I'd love to never end, and yet part of me will automatically be thinking, "only 80 pages to go," as though <i>finishing</i> the book were the goal. (:v>Jeremy Edwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01980177431018869829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-63983409333097071602014-10-24T16:48:29.001-04:002014-10-24T16:48:29.001-04:00Agreed. I actually have much less of an issue with...Agreed. I actually have much less of an issue with measuring myself by others, and much more of an issue with measuring in and of itself. One thing I like about your approach is that it sounds like you're in it for the creative joy rather than the abstract goal.Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-56627655513393109362014-10-24T16:46:55.907-04:002014-10-24T16:46:55.907-04:00Thanks, Jean! The Jungian in me kind of likes this...Thanks, Jean! The Jungian in me kind of likes this description (I'm not familiar with Winfrey's claim directly). I think there's plenty to be learned from life, for sure. I am pretty committed, though, to resisting the idea that everything is a teaching moment. I want to let some things simply be tragedies or moments of joy, with the learning part optional. That's probably because I spent too much time getting over compulsive studiousness, though—if I don't make a point of seeing things otherwise, I work too hard at getting the elusive A at life, whatever that is (or unlocking the video game achievement, to stay on theme). Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-10449508308247433652014-10-24T16:43:51.233-04:002014-10-24T16:43:51.233-04:00This is a really great parallel experience, Sacchi...This is a really great parallel experience, Sacchi. My best friend and I talk all the time about the dangers of applying narrative sensibilities to one's own life. There are so many stories, though, that it's almost impossible to avoid falling into one narrative or another—whether tragic or happy. Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-62368827242604558562014-10-24T16:42:09.612-04:002014-10-24T16:42:09.612-04:00And I can't get interested in the Big Bang The...And I can't get interested in the Big Bang Theory, despite loving video games... I guess we're even! :)Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-68170354724048012612014-10-24T16:12:51.178-04:002014-10-24T16:12:51.178-04:00Your post is thought-provoking as always, Annabeth...Your post is thought-provoking as always, Annabeth. I wonder what you think of Oprah Winfrey's claim that everyone's life has lessons to teach if we can see them. This doesn't necessarily imply the existence of Fate as some huge impersonal force -- this could just mean that we all follow certain patterns that we might not be consciously aware of. This can also apply to characters.Jean Robertahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08805088081675965859noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-20142193848672378452014-10-24T11:13:10.683-04:002014-10-24T11:13:10.683-04:00I never played story-type video games, although I ...I never played story-type video games, although I did take some interest in the ones like Civilization when my younger son used to play them (he still plays computer games, but I have no idea which ones.) But I read voraciously when I was a kid, and teenager, and as time allowed since then, and it occurred to me numerous times that the orderly structure of fiction tended to give me unrealistic expectations or assumptions about life. It's not necessarily a bad thing to assume that things will almost always turn out well, or have some pre-planned meaning, but it can be dangerous to base your actions on that assumption.<br /><br />Of course what we read as adults isn't as likely to be all happy endings and smoothed -out angles, and may even go too far in the other direction to extrapolate to real life, but it's hard to shake the earlier influences. I do remember the first book that really shocked me into a different view of reality. I read Andersonville, by MacKinley Cantor, when I was twelve, largely because I'd liked his dog stories such as The Voice of Bugle Ann. I was not prepared for this huge historical book about the notorious Confederate prison camp, which began with rape (although I didn't realize for a while what was going on) and described the unimaginably terrible conditions of the prison camp. That was the first time I encountered an appealing central character who did not survive. I was a bit more careful for a while after that about what books I chose from the local library, where I had free rein, but it was probably a useful experience in the long run. Sacchi Greenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10801164916418570059noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-54401424573921379552014-10-23T15:00:35.112-04:002014-10-23T15:00:35.112-04:00Thanks, Annabeth-
I just don't understand gau...Thanks, Annabeth-<br /><br />I just don't understand gauging success or satisfaction with oneself by way of someone else's achievements. We all have something unique to offer.Daddy Xhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12927663248424944119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-58928117132662716052014-10-23T13:42:02.359-04:002014-10-23T13:42:02.359-04:00Another 'never' for me. Apart from pacman ...Another 'never' for me. Apart from pacman I have never played a video game - even the Big Bang Theory characters can't get me interested. I'm probably missing something but oh well...JPhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10305127219838784688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-22186103728264833672014-10-23T13:22:02.029-04:002014-10-23T13:22:02.029-04:00Yeah, "thigh gap" means having a visible...Yeah, "thigh gap" means having a visible gap between one's thighs, such that each leg appears entirely separate and they don't brush together when one walks. Some people are built that way, and it can certainly look pretty. The issue is that many people aren't built that way, and for those who aren't, getting that look is not really possible. Achieving thigh gap is a common goal for "thinspiration" sites (read pro-anorexia), and there's a ton of unhealthy imagery and advice around it. <br /><br />My personal belief is that one should respect one's body type. I also believe in muscles, and am really offended by workout advice aimed at women that's about achieving a thin and fragile look without allowing muscles to bulk up at all. Thigh gap certainly involves that a lot of the time. I've seen articles advising women against, say, biking, because building muscle in the thighs will increase their diameter. That's so completely wrong-headed from my perspective. <br /><br />I happen to have a body that's inclined to build muscle, and I'm really proud of the feeling of strength I get when I'm healthy. I get that some people are naturally willowy, but I have major issues with pretending that's the only way to look pretty or be healthy. In general, as I think I've said before here, I wish that workout advice for women were more aimed toward developing abilities—strength, endurance, etc—rather than appearance. <br /><br />The thigh gap cover image I talked about above had too much of an unnatural look to me, and I was uncomfortable with the way it was being sexualized in the context of the societal body image issues I just explained. Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-44123682709588205462014-10-23T12:16:14.706-04:002014-10-23T12:16:14.706-04:00And please describe 'thigh gap'. Is it neg...And please describe 'thigh gap'. Is it negative space between a woman's thighs? How far apart they are at the apex? Sometimes I find a wide gap there intriguing. Sometimes no gap. Then again, two dogs fucking in the street can do it too. :>)Daddy Xhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12927663248424944119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-76589458458220045942014-10-23T12:03:21.922-04:002014-10-23T12:03:21.922-04:00Spoken like the inspiring rebel I've come to k...Spoken like the inspiring rebel I've come to know from your posts! I wish you plenty of great drama for the page, Daddy! :)Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-4308224838439087182014-10-23T12:02:20.812-04:002014-10-23T12:02:20.812-04:00Hi Jeremy! Gamification has been a double edged sw...Hi Jeremy! Gamification has been a double edged sword for me. I used to write about it professionally, and I'm really interested in the psychology of it. At the same time, I have a lot of questions about whether the behaviors it encourages are wise or sustainable. <br /><br />I am not as good at refusing things as I wish, and I'm full of admiring envy for those like yourself who can. Keep it up!Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-27959442714516280302014-10-23T12:00:18.361-04:002014-10-23T12:00:18.361-04:00I worried that I'd be losing people by talking...I worried that I'd be losing people by talking too much about games, but it sounds like enough is coming through. I don't think I'm naturally inclined toward worries about achievement—I had a pretty healthy attitude about grades through school, I think. I really think that my participation in Internet stuff and video games has trained me into being more achievement-conscious, which I'm not so happy about. <br /><br />The way you're describing looking at your life makes a lot of sense to me. I think it's the only sane way to do it. <br /><br />And you're right—I get tangled in knots all the time. OGG has become a vital part of my untangling process, and I'm glad you like the things I come up with. :)Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-65741725536625889172014-10-23T11:57:13.575-04:002014-10-23T11:57:13.575-04:00Hi Spencer! Glad the post makes sense even to some...Hi Spencer! Glad the post makes sense even to someone who isn't playing the latest MMOs. :)<br /><br />Judging success without driving myself insane—that's a perfect summation of the challenge, as I see it. <br /><br />I did NaNoWriMo for five years or so, and I'm glad I did. It helped me to learn how to set a writing schedule for myself. That said, nothing I ever produced for NaNoWriMo was remotely publishable, and I ultimately discovered that dashing through a first draft does not support my writing process. I edit as I go, which means I have to slow down, and I have to realize that I'm not going to produce the same amount of words each day. I've got a nice "fractal draft" method going at this point, but it really doesn't lend itself to progress bars. <br /><br />You're dead on about the outside validation, though. The hardest thing about letting go of word counts has been that reporting an impressive word count for the day has always made me feel good about myself, as if I really accomplished something. Your attitude toward handyman work sounds like the right idea. I'd like to get in a similar place with my writing. <br /><br />Good luck on your quest as well!Annabeth Leonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07455191827664110878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-28460357418012325702014-10-23T11:42:58.171-04:002014-10-23T11:42:58.171-04:00I've never been a competitive person and compu...I've never been a competitive person and computer games don't float my boat, but the metaphors you delve into describe your process quite well. When I put abstract goals in front of me, the carrot doesn't tend to attract me any more. I tend to do creative stuff first for myself, then see who else it may fit in with. The game of life is challenge enough than to create drama for drama's sake. Ummm except for writing. There, creating drama is what it's about. :>)Daddy Xhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12927663248424944119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-86328667725150730012014-10-23T09:15:40.654-04:002014-10-23T09:15:40.654-04:00So much wisdom, as always.
I've never done mu...So much wisdom, as always.<br /><br />I've never done much in the way of "gamifying" my goals, but I know people who find that helpful—and yet, I can totally understand how such strategies can become problematic in the ways you describe.<br /><br />"In real life, there are plenty of great reasons to refuse things all the time": <i>Yes.</i> I'm lucky in having been comfortable with that in my own life for most <i>of</i> my life; but, holy cow, it can be a constant chore explaining one's conscientious, well-considered, and self-aware refusals to all the "helpful" people who don't get why one doesn't want to "just do it."<br />Jeremy Edwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01980177431018869829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-63171120047937412642014-10-23T08:39:39.568-04:002014-10-23T08:39:39.568-04:00I've never been involved with world-building g...I've never been involved with world-building games, so it's difficult for me to identify with some of what you say here. Also, I realized in reading that although from the outside my life looks full of "achievement", I've never really looked at it that way, or at least, not after I graduated from college and stopped obsessing over getting good grades. I have a sense of satisfaction at what I've accomplished, but honestly, that's not what my life is about.<br /><br />My life has been rich, complicated and often surprising. I never dreamed I'd end up living overseas. I never thought I'd get married. And I certainly never imagined being a published author, or writing blog posts potentially read by hundreds or even thousands for strangers. <br /><br />I think you sometimes lose yourself in your introspections, Annabeth. You return bearing jewels to share with the rest of us, but I get the feeling those inward journeys can be quite distressing, even painful. Lisabet Saraihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05162514190572269660noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9156334464585894857.post-83532800363181901892014-10-23T07:44:30.245-04:002014-10-23T07:44:30.245-04:00Annabeth:
There is so much powerful stuff in here ...Annabeth:<br />There is so much powerful stuff in here its hard to pick just one. The last game I was serious about was Space Invaders. My older son plays one of those multiplayer interactive games. Its fun to listen to him. I can tell he's the guy in charge. Someone has to lead the quest.<br /><br />The commonality is finding was to judge our success that don't drive us insane.<br /><br />What's been even more poisonous for me than the idea of achievements is the idea of measuring progress the way a video game does. Some writers put progress bars for their novels up on their websites, as if a novel is a file downloading at a speed of, say, 1,667 words per day. (With NaNoWriMo approaching, that example speed seems apt). <br /><br />I shudder at the thought of NaNoWriMo. I realize some people need that outside stimulus. Ditto for the progress chart. I think they are both methods for soliciting outside validation-an invitation to addiction.<br /><br />In my day job. I am a handyman. It's the first employment scheme I've ever had where the work is internally validating. I spent years failing at white collar jobs where measurable achievement was the only source of validation. If the bosses didn't recognize it, it was useless and "it' changed with their whims. Now I have the luxury of knowing my work is good even if it isn't appreciated. I have very solid boundaries. I know what I can't do and won't do and therefore don't do. I've tried to take the same approach with writing. It's not so easy. <br /><br />Best wishes on your quest.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15484640447109164744noreply@blogger.com