Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Romanticide by Suz deMello

I had a mad crush once on an art history professor. I was a seventeen-year-old freshman and he was twenty years my senior. I had gotten laid exactly once before we met—a disappointing experience that took place the first weekend I went away to university. I did not bother repeating it for months until I found myself crushing on...let's call him James.

I turned into a madwoman. From where had all this passion come? I didn't know, but what I knew was that I wanted him more than my next breath. 

I made my interest clear and he did the same. But he didn't seduce me until his class was over, so it wasn’t until the next semester that we finally got what we both wanted—sort of.

One memorable night, I found myself thoroughly fucked in a cozy bed aboard a houseboat—very romantic. He was great. I felt as though I was flying, in total bliss and joy.

Then he said, “So, you have trouble coming?”

I crashed to the earth and couldn't fly again for years.


  1. Some guys just have to stick their foot in their mouths. How often does a woman climax her first time with a guy? Must be her fault if she doesn't? Jeez-

  2. Surprised he even noticed!

  3. I'm surprised too. What a let-down.

  4. Ah, the kind of cutting comment that hurts for years, and now and then inspires theoretical retorts that we could never think of at the time. I'm so sorry. What a prick.

    Hmm. "It depends on the guy." "If it's good enough it's worth waiting for." "You didn't notice the first two?" But nothing would work when the age/power differential was so great.

  5. This is another one that makes me want to pronounce uuugh for about 15 minutes straight. I'd have spent weeks coming up with things I could have said in reply, if not years...

  6. Hey, Suz. At least you enjoyed it, before he opened his mouth.

    When you're that young, it's hard to figure out what's important and what's not.


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