the numbers game

Ménage, threesomes, foursomes, group sex—polygamy. Different words with similar meanings. Men have admitted for years that having two or more women at once is one of their ultimate fantasies. I read a LOT of it during my college years in Robert Heinlein’s later works, including Time Enough for Love, Cat Who Walked through Walls, and To Sail beyond the Sunset. Whole cultures and religions have been built around polygyny (one man, many women) after all. And you know sometimes those sultans, or sheiks, or whatever, weren’t only doing one concubine at a time.

So now we’re starting to see an open interest in polyandry—one woman, multiple men. Is this new? Not really. I remember being faintly horrified by Paint your Wagon, as a kid. It started on Broadway in 1951. The movie with Clint Eastwood and Lee Marvin came out in 1969—an apt year, no?

Face it folks, in the last 50 years, women have come a long way in understanding and expressing their own sexuality. The fantasy of having multiple partners do things to your body that require more than one mouth, two hands, and one set of sex organs is pretty powerful, no matter which washroom you use.

We’ve seen this week that ménage á trois is properly defined as a situation where the multiple partners are all committed and emotionally attached to one another in a living arrangement. In other words—polygamy. Does polygamy, or true ménage work in real life? I’d have to say that like any lifestyle choice it works for some and not others. There are certainly going to be issues. First of all there are social ramifications. No hospital in the world is going to acknowledge two fathers in the birthing room (okay, maybe a few, but not most). Same for schools. Legal issues like health coverage and mortgages can get awkward. It may work, but I’m bloody damn certain it isn’t easy. Also I’d imagine it’s very hard to maintain a relationship where all three bonds remain equal, and where two of the partnership don’t eventually edge the third out. I know I’m too insecure to share my partner, not even with another man. I need to know that in our relationship, he’s all about me, just as I’m all about him.

But the fantasy—yeah, that’s powerful. Just like vampire romance is powerful because those characters truly get their happy-ever-after. And one thing my dear cohorts on this blog have forgotten to mention, is that right now, ménage romances sell. Sometimes folks, the bottom line is, really, the bottom line. I looked at sales figures one month when all the bills were overdue and weighed my options. McDonalds or ménage? Guess what won?

Now with that said, once I told myself to do it, I had a blast. It’s silly and fun and again, it’s fantasy. The characters are two elves (m/f) and a demon (the other m). And I enjoyed every minute of writing their story. (Three for All, Ellora’s Cave, October 2008) It is an m-m-f story, which means, I’m told, that the guys get into each other as well as the girl. I find this a lot more believable on an emotional level. If three people are rolling around in the bed, eventually, penis is going to rub against penis. It’s a pretty thin membrane between the two holes, folks. It just doesn’t work for me, logically, if the guys aren’t at least a little turned on by each other. The exceptions to this I’ve seen in fantasy, include Anny’s Honeysuckle, where the two brothers are sort of two halves of the same being. I can suspend disbelief if you give me a reason. I just have less problems accepting it the other way. As Regina said, sometimes paranormal elements make the whole thing work better. In my elf and demon cultures, there’s no prejudice against same gender attraction or groups.

So, yes, I wrote a story because the market is there. Does that make me a hack? If so, that’s fine with me. I think the story will stand on its own merit. It's a true romance, just with three protagonists. I enjoyed writing it, and I like the characters as well as their HEA. Does that make me depraved? Snort. I have the most conservative lifestyle of anyone I know. I’ve been happily married for almost 23 years to the only man I’ve ever been with. No real desire to broaden my personal experience. But in my stories? Ah there, the sky is the limit.

Seriously…sex in flight…gotta write that sometime. Got a gargoyle/half dragon story coming up…could work there…