Focusing on what's Important

I have a very simple way of deciding how best to set the physical scene - if it's important enough for the character to notice, it's important enough to tell the reader about. If it's not important enough for them to notice, then it's hard to mention it from that character's point of view without making the words sound false and unrealistic.

The only problem with that way of writing is that some of my characters are often pretty oblivious to the big things that go on around them. They notice weird little details instead. Like Luke in You First:

Desperately trying to concentrate on anything other than Justin’s erection pounding into him, Luke scrambled for any other details and senses to focus on.

The cotton sheet underneath him was pale blue. At this angle, with his nose barely an inch from the surface, Luke saw it was actually two shades of thread blended together. He couldn’t bring himself to care. His prostate sang inside him, coaxing him to join in with it in harmony, groaning his pleasure at every inch of delicious friction.

The thing is, Luke is in his own bedroom at this point - he doesn't walk into the room and think - Oh, the walls are painted blue. People don't do that in places they go to every day. Luke's only going to notice something he has good reason to notice.

Most characters only notice things that are different to usual, or that they have particularly strong feelings about. Like Charles in The Gift:

As the door closed behind Nicky, Charles dropped his head back against the high chair back and stared up at the brightly coloured decorations festooning the ceiling. His pet had outdone himself this year. Everything that didn’t run away fast enough was wrapped in tinsel and sparkles.

He closed his eyes against the garish display of Christmas cheer.

Although he’d never been present for his pet’s final Christmas Eve tradition—the packing of the last present right before he went to bed—Charles could well imagine him kneeling on the floor in their bedroom, biting his bottom lip, concentrating on getting the brightly coloured paper just right. It was a far better sight to rest his eyes upon than yard upon yard of garlands criss-crossing the ceiling.

The room isn't important to him right then. In a very real way, he's only seeing the decorations.

One good thing about the character going somewhere new is that it gives you the chance to give the reader an over all impression when the character assesses his new surroundings. Alistair gets that sort of chance in Secret Service:

It was pretty much what he expected for a hotel that claimed to offer everything a dominant client could need for the night. It was half bedroom and half dungeon play room.

His boyfriend just stood there, looking around the room. His eyes flickered one way and another, from the St Andrew’s cross, to the cage in the corner, to the opulent bed, decked out so it looked fit for a king—or fit for a dominant who needed that sort of prop to appear majestic in the eyes of a submissive.

Alistair cast a look over the room too. Not to his taste, but neither was this stupid situation. Just because the dominant inside him was howling its pleasure at finally being allowed to play with Sheridan, that didn’t mean it was right.

Initial assessments of spaces can be fun to write - especially if they give you a chance to bring out the character's personality quirks. In Turquoise and Leather, Eric goes back to Georges apartment for the first time. His first actions on walking into a new space tell George a lot - and maybe the tell the reader what kind of man he is too.

“You said I have three kinks. What’s the third?”

George relaxed. His reading of Eric’s submission was correct. He was there for the night.

“What was the first thing you did when you walked in here?”

Eric frowned and looked out over the city. “Admired the view? It’s impressive, but I wouldn’t call it fetish worthy.”

“What else?” George pushed. Did Eric even notice?

The frown deepened, Eric thought for a few more seconds. “Glanced around your apartment? I know there’s a cliché to live up to, but if you think I know who designed what, you’ve got the wrong guy. I can tell you the fire surround is slate, the bathroom floor is marble and the counter top over there is granite, but that’s it.” He pointed to the various examples of geology as he enumerated them.

George shook his head. “The first thing you did.”

George is on home ground in this scene. But is it the home court advantage that's causing him to lead and Eric to follow. Come to that - is Eric really the type to be fazed by a pent house apartment?

How a person feels in a new space can tell you a lot about them. In Silent Night, Vincent has just moved into a new house. It's his space, but it's still new to him:

He opened the door to the master bedroom. The house still didn’t feel like his home, but it was time to make it feel like his domain.

Inside the bedroom, the important things were already unpacked. There was his bed, the one it took the moving men three hours to get up the stairs. Vincent had to admit it was something of a monstrosity. It was a bugger to find a bedroom it would even fit in.

It practically went without saying a brass bed frame should look old fashioned and homely, but when the metal writhed and twisted at each end, sinuously curling around itself in a way which made everyone who saw it want to reach out and stroke, it became something altogether more interesting.

The frame was a work of art. It had also proved itself to be an amazingly versatile piece of kit, for a man who enjoyed tying his lovers up.

Along with the bed, Vincent had found time to unpack crisp dark red sheets and his toy box. He might not know where in the dozens of boxes littering his kitchen the tin opener was, but he could put his hands on a pair of handcuffs at a moment’s notice. A man had to stick to his priorities.

Vincent looked across at Hannah.

"I’m going to tie you up."

Flicking through my stories, I'm quite surprised by how much scene setting some of them include. I thought I would struggle to find even a single snippet to share with everyone! (That said - there are books that aren't quoted from because I really couldn't find anything appropriate, lol.)

For me, it will always be more important to set the emotional scene - to set the characters up so they are able to find their happy ever after with the man or woman they are introduced to during the book. Setting the emotional scene comes first. What colour the wall paper is, that's more hit and miss. If the character doesn't care, I don't expect the reader to either.

*****

And now I suppose I should move on to the other half of my post. I should let everyone know that this will be my last post on this blog.

I sent my first submission to Total-e-bound on June 14th last year. In the last twelve months I've had 17 titles accepted. It's been fantastic, if a little bit insane.

But all that has unfortunately led to a flare up of an old medical condition and I'm having to cut back on various commitments. Since I would much prefer not to have to cut back on writing, I've reached the decision that I should try to cut back on other things - blogging is one of those things.

This week I'm stepping down from both Oh, Get a Grip! and Writer's Evolution, which I was contributing to every Tuesday.

I'm keeping going with my own blog here. So if you want to keep up to date with what's going on in my world, you're more than welcome to join me there.

It's been great getting to know the other writers in this blog. As of next month, there will be a new face joining the crew - Ashley Lister will be taking over the Thursday slot. I'm sure he will fit in perfectly.

And that's it from me.

Take care everyone. It's been fun :)

Kim Dare.
Kink, love and a happy ending. Do you Dare?

Never say Never!

When I started writing erotic romance, I had no intention of writing menages. They just didn't appeal.

I think part of the problem is I'd read too many BDSM stories that involve the sort of menages that leave me cold. They always seemed to revolve around the idea that one submissive wasn't enough for a dominant, or on the other hand that the dominant had the right to offer his submissive to whoever he chose. Neither arrangement appealed to me, or to my characters.

But guess what my first published story included?

Yep. A menage. An all male, paranormal one to be precise.

I didn't intend it to. And like Jamie, looking back I can see that there is something in common about the psychology that leads into the menages. The characters don't start out wanting a threesome. It's not their fantasy or anything like that. It's just what turns out to be right for them. It's what they need to have their happy ending.

Take Nicky and Charles from The Gift for example. Nicky doesn't like the idea of menages at all, but he knows that his master has enjoyed them with other lovers in the past, and he he can't settle until he's at least tried it and seen what all the fuss is about.

And since there's been a very cute and enthusiastic spirit of Christmas Past lurking around throughout the book, one who is about to disappear into the either before the end of the night, this is their perfect chance.

It's the only threesome I've ever written where all three characters didn't live happily ever after all together at the end. That said - it sure as hell makes them all very happy while it lasts!

Nicky glanced at the spirit. He looked even more nervous than him. Nicky offered the spirit a reassuring smile as they joined him to stand at the edge of the bed.

Charles wasted no time with preliminaries. The toga was barely held together by a few clips and pins. They were gone in moments. A gentle nudge backwards and the spirit lay sprawled naked on the bed.

Nicky crawled across the mattress to him. While his master hadn’t shared him with another man before, Nicky was well aware Charles loved the sight of two men enjoying each other’s bodies. He kissed the spirit, guiding him to lie back comfortably on the mattress.

If the spirit did not have the strength and muscular bulk of his master, then he was still well-built, with a fine torso of sculpted lines. It was strange to explore another man’s body, but it got easier as Nicky got used to it. He ran his hands over the spirit’s skin, enjoying the way his touch affected the spirit.

He was so innocent and untried, so responsive to every finger tip trailing over his body. Both Charles and the spirit followed his every movement over the spirit’s skin. Nicky bit his lip, realising Charles took more pleasure in watching him with the spirit than he would probably gain from topping the spirit when the time came.

He looked to his master. Charles smiled at him. Leaning over, he brushed their lips together. It looked like a gentle touch, beneath the surface his tongue thrust hungrily into Nicky’s mouth. The spirit could not see that, it was theirs, their private moment in a shared bed.

Nicky smiled when Charles broke the kiss. The spirit watched them, slack jawed. Nicky turned back to him and kissed him. Nicky had rarely taken the lead with any lover—certainly not with his master. It felt awkward at first to feel in charge of everything, to be the man guiding the novice rather than the novice himself.

The spirit gradually relaxed and began to return Nicky’s caresses with tentative touches of his own. He didn’t have Charles’s way about him. His hands felt pleasant on Nicky’s skin, but there was nothing special about his touch.

A finger tip trailing along his spine sent a shockwave straight through him. Nicky looked over his shoulder at his master. Charles’s touch always felt different. Nicky tried to hold back a shiver as he kissed his way down the spirit’s body.

When he reached the spirit’s erection, Nicky carefully wrapped his lips around the tip. He’d always liked going down on men, even before he came to his master. There was something about it that always made his own arousal peak, but the spirit wasn’t used to the sensations as Charles was. His hips bucked wildly, Nicky only just managed to ride out the motion.

The spirit put his hand on the back of Nicky’s head.

Nicky forced himself to stay still and not panic. He closed his eyes for a moment.

“He doesn’t like anyone’s hand on the back of his head,” Charles said for him.

Nicky opened his eyes and looked up at them both.

The spirit took his hand away. “I’m sorry, I…”

Charles took the spirit’s hand and softened the correction by leading it back to Nicky’s neck. “He likes you to touch him here.”

He guided the spirit’s fingers to trail along his neck, underneath his ear, to touch the sensitive little spot which made a shiver run down Nicky’s spine. He gasped, sucking firmly around the spirit’s cock.

The spirit groaned his pleasure.

A few moments later, Nicky felt another hand on the back of his head, a more familiar touch that didn’t make him feel panicked. He looked up at his master.

“You said…” the spirit whispered to Charles.

“I am not just anyone,” Charles said simply, “I am his master.”

********************************

The thing about that one, is that it was a very specific circumstance. Charles and Nicky were able to work out something in their relationship without running the risk of bringing someone into their lives for anything longer than that night.

My next attempt was somewhat different.

I wrote Between Tooth and Paw for a specific anthology call. The menage had to be MFM - that's the one where the two guys are straight, in case your wondering. Quite a change of direction for a writer who usually writes MM!

I'll let you in on a secret - this story almost drove me crazy. I put my name down for the anthology while I was in a bit of a strop over something entirely unrelated. I didn't actually think about if I could write it until it was too late.

Luckily, it turned out to be a challenge in all the best ways.

By far the hardest part was trying to think of a reason why two dominant men would want to share one submissive. The answer was easy in the end. If they want her, they have to share. And since they really do want her, they have to - although that doesn't stop them bickering the whole time.


“I want you to ride me.”

Jasmine immediately pushed herself up onto her elbow, ready to get into whatever position he wanted. Stafford knelt on the bed behind her and gently guided her to spread her legs so he could put his knees between them. She leaned forward putting her hands on the mattress, as if she thought he wanted her doggie style, like the damn wolf inevitably would. Sitting back on his heels, Stafford pulled her back close to him instead, so she would be able to ride him.

She hesitated for a moment, and then she seemed to realise what he wanted and she nodded her understanding. “Yes, sir.”

“That’s right,” he soothed, as she he guided her to lower herself down onto the full length of his erection. Stafford pushed her hair aside and kissed her neck as she settled onto him.

Looking across at Hayden, still watching their every move, Stafford met his eyes as he bit down on her neck.

His teeth sliced neatly through her skin. She threw her head back with a pleasure filled gasp as her muscles clamped down around him.

Hayden tilted his head to the side, frowning as if he only then realised Stafford told the truth when he said human women enjoyed being bitten by him. Stafford smiled against the cut and teased it with his tongue as blood began to seep into his mouth.

She was so sweet, so perfect, and he didn’t need Hayden’s sense of smell to tell him she wasn’t afraid anymore—he could taste her pleasure, hot and eager on his tongue. He rocked his hips, pushing his cock deeper into her slit as she rode him and he felt her pleasure grow and double.

Reaching around with his free hand he teased her nipple between his thumb and forefinger the way she seemed to like so much. She seemed to appreciate a rougher touch than other women in his experience. A sharper pinch of his fingers, a scrape of his nail across the nipple and she gasped and writhed around his cock for him.

He closed his eyes and sucked at the small wounds on her neck, coaxing the blood to flow more freely as his fingers danced across her breasts. Jasmine shakily took up the rhythm he set for her and she began to ride him properly. She took control of the movements, leaving him free to concentrate on the feeding while she worked hard and fast for both their pleasure. All of a sudden she faltered, gasping and bucking as her rhythm deserted her.

Endorphins failed to pour into his mouth. Her blood made it very clear she hadn’t come. He frowned, breaking the bite to speak to her.

Something moved against the base of his cock.

“What the…!”

He looked down. Hayden’s head was down between her legs, lapping at her clit as she rode him, and the damn wolf wasn’t being too careful about who received the benefits of his tongue’s attention.

Before he could reach around Jasmine and push the other man away, she moaned low in the back of her throat and dropped her head right back onto his shoulder. She shifted in his embrace, turning her head to rub her cheek against his neck. Her eyes were closed, but he didn’t need to see into her eyes to see her pleasure.

She reached back for him. One hand threaded into his hair to guide his lips back to her neck, begging him to resume the feeding. Her other hand went behind his waist, to slide down over his arse. She whimpered and tugged at his body, pleading with him to thrust into her, imploring him to ignore the other man and finish what he had started.

Stafford automatically kissed the wound on her neck. His every instinct told him she was right. What the pup did was irrelevant. He could wring Hayden’s neck for his impudence later. Right then, when pleasure was flowing through her veins and straight onto his tongue, there was nothing to do but keep going.

Warm breaths caressed his cock as Hayden’s tongue worked Jasmine to fever pitch, but right then it was impossible to care if those breaths belonged to a man or a werewolf or anything else.

Jasmine whimpered again and bit her lip. Her rhythm was shot after the shock the wolf had given her, but she was still doing her very best to ride him, encasing his cock in her hot, wet slit only to slide off him a little way and repeat the process again and again.

With each bit of pleasure his teeth and the other man’s tongue gave her, she writhed against him, no longer able to think but only to react. The hand she’d tangled in his hair, slipped forward to stroke his cheek, then she arched sharply, pressing herself back against his body. Her hand went to his hair again, as if those strands twining through her fingers represented her only grip on reality.

Her other hand left his backside and move forward to tangle into Hayden’s longer, fairer hair too.

She was so close to coming, Stafford could taste it. She tried to say something, but she couldn’t even seem to catch her breath to ask either man to push her over the edge.

Stafford pressed his teeth deeper into her jugular.

*************************

As for what comes next?

I've come a long way from not liking menages. For a start I understand now that I do love menages were the characters all live happily ever after together. And I know that I love a certain combination of characters.

MFM and MMF are very nice, but MMM is the one that seriously rocks for me.

Two minor characters make an appearance in Between Tooth and Paw. Mr Washington and his submissive Ethan Stewart. I am head over heels in love with both of them. And they are now the starting point of a whole series of MMM paranormal menages.

What about you? Always in favour of menages? Is there a type of menage that rocks your boat or turns you off more than all the others?

Kim Dare.
Kink, love and a happy ending. Do you Dare?