This topic is as befuddling to me as the famous Abbot and Costello bit. I still don't know what deep third is. (Wait, 'I don't know' is on third.) I'm going to be reading Garce's post with pencil and paper. Lisabet's was every informative.
Some general reactions are the best I can do.
I like first person, but not in present tense, as in (dare I say it?) FSOG. It comes off as clumsy to me, like the writer is trying to have me in the scene. I'm a voyeur not a participant. It's hard to sustain dramatic tension over a long period in first person. (witness again, FSOG) The writer is cut off from devices such as the ever faithful, 'meanwhile'. Meanwhile is the bomb strapped to the leg of the dining room table unseen by the couple eating dinner. It radically alters the meaning of their conversation.
Most of my own inventory of short stories are first person, past tense. It's an easy vehicle for an inexperienced writer to drive. Some humor and good dialogue can bring plenty of entertainment to a 5,000-10,000 word story.
I love spoken dialogue. My editor has to chide me to do more scene setting and to have characters display physical manifestations of the emotions expressed in dialogue. Some of my best stuff (IMO) is all dialogue microfiction. I don't know how it would be categorized. I wish there was a market or an anthology or two for this kind of work. (see below)
I've never tried writing exclusively in second person. I throw a 'you' around once in a while. I don't get how you do it in a fiction piece. Maybe you could suggest some well written pieces.
I'm trying to do more third person work. Like I said, I don't know what deep third is. (Garce, you're up dude.) I have a tendency to drift from third person to omniscient within the same scene, something I see regularly as a reader. Apparently, it's not a good thing. Not according my editor who administered numerous jolts through the shock collar I wore when we were editing "Bliss".
That's about it for me. I'm going to stop before I reduce the sum total of human knowledge any farther.
So what's on second?
How about a little social commentary in an all dialogue piece?
At The Border
By Spencer Dryden
Fargo, North Dakota, August 28, 2020
“Officer, I wasn’t speeding. Why am I being stopped?”
“You failed to stop at the checkpoint, ma’am.”
“Checkpoint, what check point?”
“The one about a half mile back that you missed.”
“What’s the checkpoint for?”
“Pregnancy check, ma’am.”
“Yes ma’am. We need a urine sample to be sure you’re not leaving the state to have an abortion.”
“And what if I am? You can’t stop me.”
“As a matter of fact, we can. Under the North Dakota Comprehensive Preservation of Life Act of 2020. You need to give us a urine sample before crossing into Minnesota to prove you’re not pregnant.”
“And if I don’t?”
“We can detain you under Article 616.”
“Yes, it’s a provision of the law that allows the Department of Health to restrict travel of any woman of child bearing age suspected of leaving the state for the purposes of an abortion.”
“I don’t understand, when did they get that power?”
“The state has had the power to restrict travel for public health purposes since the great influenza outbreak just after World War I.”
“But I’m not contagious.”
“Perhaps not, but if you’re travelling to have an abortion, we have the moral and legal authority to detain you.”
“This is outrageous.”
“No ma’am. What’s outrageous is the millions of lives terminated every year by women like you.”
“Women like me?”
“Yes, women like you. We know you have had unprotected sex within the last 24 hours and since this is the middle of your cycle there is a high probability that you will become pregnant.”
“How can you possibly know that?”
“Ma’am you seem to be without shame in your texts, e-mails and phone calls. Don’t you know that people are listening?”
“You’re monitoring me? How can you possibly justify that?”
“Crime prevention ma’am. We’re preventing a premeditated murder of an unborn child.”
“My cycle, how could you possible know that?”
“A very sophisticated data mining algorithm. We can predict your ovulation within a day.”
“Exactly ma’am. Jesus and the people of North Dakota want to end abortion.”
“But I’m not pregnant.”
“Then pee in the cup and prove it.”
“And if I do that?”
“Then I can just red-band you and let you go.”
“Just…red band me?” Just what does that mean?”
“It means you’ll need to return and be tested in another three days. You have two days of maximum fertility ahead.”
“I can’t believe you can do this.”
“We can and we will.”
“But what about my rights? It’s my body.”
“But not your uterus. That belongs to the state.”
Copyright 8/29/13 Spencer Dryden. No part of this material may be copied or reused without permission of the author.