Monday was a holiday here in Ontario (and a few other provinces--I forget which ones).
Monday was Family Day.
When it first came into existence a couple years ago, I was down on Family Day. It seemed like such a blah Conservative Government idea. Everything's about the family, with them. The rest of us don't matter.
Sure I've found the woman I want to be with until the day we die (simultaneously, I can only hope, because I don't want to face a world without her), but marriage isn't on my mind.
And no I don't want kids. Do you even know how much I enjoy sleeping? Sleeping is, like, three of my top five favourite pastimes. I'm not willing to give that up. Just let me have my bed and let me have my cats and I'm good.
God, I love my cats.
|Giselle, preparing to fly off into the sunset...|
You can change your mind just by wanting to. Such things are possible.
I re-envisioned Family Day as an inclusive event celebrating family in all its forms. Celebrating chosen family. Celebrating extended family and family of origin and friends and roommates and all the people we love and care for.
My girlfriend blew my mind the first time she told me I was family. I don't mean in a, "Hey, I was just charting my family tree and it turns out we're distant cousins" sort of way, although that would be hella kinky.
Damn. Now I want to take up genealogy. I've always had a thing about cousins.
|That's why this happened.|
What Sweet meant was that family is about care and mutual support and knowing that person will ALWAYS exist in your life, in some way. Family is someone to whom you're inextricably bound. You can argue, you can disagree, you can even have "knock-down blowouts" as she calls them--those fights you have where you hurt each other deeply and you stew in resentment for days and you tell yourselves you'll never forgive each other--but you'll always come back to each other. Because you're part of each other.
On Family Day, I wanted to blog about my kin. But then I spent the whole day with them and all our outdoor activities in the frigid 13-below-zero Canadian winter really tired me out.
So I didn't get to tell the world how much I love my mom and my siblings. I didn't get to tell anyone how awesome they are for claiming my girlfriend as one of their own, for embracing her with all their hearts, for never once questioning her gender identity or misgendering her when she wasn't around. They've welcomed her into our tribe so lovingly my eyes are filling with tears as I write this.
Family can be a beautiful thing. Maybe it does deserve a day of celebration after all.