Wednesday, December 2, 2015

"Cousin It"

by Daddy X

 All tits and ass.

“Yeah, Jeff… she be my cousin, dude. Thought you’d like her.”

Delbert brought the young girl by my apartment with a bag over her head. The voluptuous thing was barely clothed in the shortest cut-offs I’d ever seen. The inner pockets flapped on her thighs. Above, shapely tits bulged from a red-on-white polka dot halter. After all, it was Daisy Mae on Halloween.

“Jesus, what a body!” I said.

“We call her ‘cousin It’ ‘cause all’s she cares about is her cunt,” said Del. “Whole family so embarrassed with her. Can’t leave her fine self alone. That’s why she handcuffed behind. Ain’t that right, cuz?”

“Yep,” said a muffled voice. “I like to fuck and suck.”

“Why ‘It’?” I asked.

“’Causa that’s what my family calls it,” said my tall, skinny running partner Del. “Sex, dude. Anything ‘bout sex is called ‘it’ by them.”

“That’s all pretty simple, isn’t it? Does that cover the whole story?”

“We’s too religious to say all them words. What all them means.”

“I like to fuck and suck,” came the wispy voice from the bag.

Del said, “We know, sweetie. Just tellin’ Jeff over here. We’s too related to do anything.”

“You only my third cousin,” tittered the girl.

“Yeah,” said Del, “but that’s on my mom and your dad’s side. What about your mom’s uncle?”


“Well, you’ve come to the right place, sweet thing,” I said. “No way you’re related to me.”

“Oh goody!” she replied, rubbing her thighs together.

Yanking her shorts down, Del said, “Look! It don’t bother shavin’.”

“Why so bushy, er… what’s your name again?”

“Everybody calls me It,” she said. “I’m all about what I do and the effects I cause. I am the ‘it’ girl right now. I can wait and be someone else later this life.”

I thought her answer seemed more sophisticated than I’d figured her for, but quickly dismissed the thought while I could get away with gawking at her assets. “But what about the bag,” I said. “Isn’t that objectifying?”
“What’s your point?” she answered. “As ‘It’, I am the object.”

“Hey cuz,” said Del. “Show yer ass off. Still got those cane marks?”

“It’s awkward with these cuffs,” said It.

“Well, we’re not takin’ ‘em off, sweetcakes. And you know why, don’t you?”


“And why would that be, cousin It?”

“Cause I be foolin’ around with myself if’n you did,” said It.

“Yep. You got it, It. And would you mind tellin’ ol’ Jeff here just what you might do? If we let you out the cuffs, I mean?”

“I’d likely finger myself, Jeff. I’d finger fuck myself silly until somebody pulled me off my sorry ass self.”

Del said that what had happened time and again would likely happen still again—that his cousin would curl herself up in a ball, business down, legs tucked up under, hands pressed into her crotch. Her elbows tucked in so tight, she’d leave few handholds to lift her entire weight. It sometimes took three or four grown men to lift and evict the violently masturbating girl-ball from a room. Apparently it always proved better not to let It get into that position in the first place.

“So what are you two up to tonight?” I asked.

“We’s thinkin’ about trick an’ treatin’,” said It.

I quipped, “Well, I can just imagine the treats, but—”

“Yep, Jeff. We chargin’ too,” said Del. “Whaddaya think, we stupid? Who’s  gonna give away pussy?”

“I don’t need nothin’,” said It. “Just wanna suck and fuck, like I said before. You can keep all the damn money, cousin Del.”

“Hey, I got an idea,” I said, thinking it might be a good idea to practice the routine first. “You pretend you come to my door—like I’m a potential john—and we’ll see if you can seduce me. I’ll be your trainer.” I figured these idiots would maybe cut me in on the action.

“Would you really do that for us?” said It. “Lemme blow you?”

“Well, It. Umm… Could you go a little slower?” I said, as a critical suggestion. “I know the score, but somebody else may not. You could lose the trick by comin’ on too strong like that.”

“What’s to think about?” said Del. “Pussy’s pussy. Yep, pussy’s pussy and everybody gonna want a piece of something like It.”

“You bet,” said It. “Men just love to fuck me and have me suck them off. They tell me ‘It makes it real.’”

“Hey, Del,” I said. “What’s that you’re doing? You’re cutting a hole in the bag.”

It said, “Don’t you poke me in the face with them scissors, cousin Del!”

“We don’t want It to spoil the family name,” said Del, “so we keep ‘er under the bag when she be fuckin an suckin’. So nobody see her face.”

“I love to fuck and suck.”

“Yes, my dear, I know,” I said. “Just want Del here and you to realize how valuable I could be if I come along. Let me try you out first.”

“I just want to fuck and suck.”

“We know, sweet.” I said. “We just gotta get the logistics right.”

“Logs?” said It. “Nobody said nothin’ about no damn log. Ain’t nobody stickin’ no log up there. Cocks only!”

“Never mind, It. Nobody’s going to hurt you,” I said. “Del, would you mind cutting this hole already so I can test out her mouth for you? I’ll make sure you price things right, partner. And just for you, I’ll stick it in her cunt too, just to make sure, you know.”

“O, she got one fine mouth on her, an’ I seen plenty guys fuckin’ her too. An’ diggin’ It just fine. Here, I’ll finish this hole here and you just stick your dick in… Now, get down on it, It!”

“Now’s the time?” asked It, arms stuck straight out, lowering herself blindly to her knees.

“I’m gonna get me some cock now?”

“Yep,” said Del. “Get ready an’ suck him real good, cuz.”

I slid my cock through the hole in the bag until it hit It’s lips, her suckling lips, her irresistible lips that drew me into It’s great devouring maw.

“Ooooowee! She be sucking you now, Jeff. Didn’t I say so? Ain’t I be all right on how she do? Suckin’ you off like some kinda champ there. Ain’t she, dude?”

“Oh yes, she does have a particular stroke, now doesn’t she, my friend? But I must say a little too much tooth. Em—It? Could you please loosen up a bit with them choppers, honey?”

The teeth held harder still.

Del said, “Got ‘im cuz? Got im good an’ tight?”

She made a murmur in the affirmative.

“He ain’t gettin’ away?”


“Well, you just hold him right there, It. And I’ll go through the house. Okay, dude. Where’s the cash? You got a watch?”

“What the fuck, Del—!”

“You should be flattered. You be the first one wanted a treat and got the trick.”

From: “The Gonzo Collection”. Link to your right. That hot Willsin Rowe cover with the big brand X.


  1. Sorry about the formatting. I couldn't get back in to fix it. Sigh...

    1. Fixed it, I think. Or at least mostly.

    2. Still looks wrong when I first get here, but click on "comments" and then it's back to normal.

      Wow, Daddy X! Great story!

  2. This is one of my favorite stories in the book, Daddy. And definitely on topic!

  3. More on Delbert when I guest blog at Beyond Romance Dec. 12

  4. Very on topic, as people said. I love all the twists in The Gonzo Collection.

    1. Thanx, Annabeth!.

      And double thanks for the stellar review!