By Jenna Byrnes
I never was the outdoorsy type. Sure, as a kid, we did the usual camping, boating, swimming thing that people do when they live near a lake. I liked it well enough then, of course I didn't have to do any of the work. Dad set up the camp and did the outdoor cooking, mom cleaned up after us and did the rest of the cooking. I had older siblings who were probably in the trailer helping mom wash dishes. I just remember swimming all day, and sitting around by the campfire making s'mores and playing cards into the evening.
One night I remember sitting in the car after being roused by dad in a raging thunderstorm. Six of us and a dog piled into a rocking car and watched through flashes of lightning as our pontoon boat got picked up from one side of the cove and was returned, upside down, on the other side. We were fine, the trailer was good, but that boat was toast. The next day we went cove-diving for lawn chairs and whatever else had sunk to the murky bottom, and the boat shop came and towed away our pontoon. One of those memories I won't ever forget.
As an (older) teenager, I spent time outside with my friends but I never did acquire the art of, as one friend called it, 'pissing in the wind'. When we'd drink enough beer I'd make her drive me to an outhouse to take care of business. She did it, but she always scoffed. All she needed was a private spot and a tissue- and I think the tissue was optional.
The appeal of outdoor sex also passed me by. It was never a fantasy of mine, and I can't recall writing about it except for in the shifter series that Jude and I have (which is not really the same, since those guys live outdoors anyway.)
These days, I don't enjoy spending a lot of time outside. Allergies are mostly under control, but they're still miserable. Mosquitoes, wasps, chiggers, and flies seem to love me. I could do without them. We have a nice yard, and had enough foresight to create nice kids to take care of it.
When I want to see nature I'll look out the window. Who am I kidding? My blinds are usually drawn. I'll turn on the TV or the computer. *G*