by Giselle Renarde
I just ate an entire pizza. I'm pretty full, but I don't feel guilty about it. Food is my friend, and everybody who's told you otherwise is a dirty rotten liar... and, frankly, a bit of a jerk.
See, I'm a tiny person. I'm a toothpick person. If I wanted to donate blood (and I do), I'd have to gain 20 pounds (and I'm trying), but this is my body. I came this way right out of the box (ewww--that's not what I meant). I've never dieted in my life. In fact, I reverse-dieted in an attempt to put on some pounds when I was younger, but my heart gets sludgy now if I eat too much fatty food. Gettin' old, yo!
Anyone who doesn't share my body type probably thinks I'm bragging. Look at me! I'm so skinny! There's a reason I've never written this blog post, though I've wanted to many times: Oh, Giselle, you poor little rich girl. Stop your complaining. You don't know how good you've got it.
Actually, I shouldn't say I'm skinny, because I see my body as well-proportioned. I like it. I have zero complaints, aside from the joint pain. Joint pain sucks. Aside from that, I don't have a problem with my body.
Other people have a problem with my body. I know because they tell me--to my face, behind my back, in veiled criticisms or back-handed compliments. "Don't you eat?" "Eww... I can see your bones." "Why are your cheeks so sunken? You look like a crack whore."
My favourite has got to be, "Are you anorexic? Haha." Umm no. And I'm not sure why you're laughing. "What's wrong? It's a compliment. Haha."
Wow. No. It's really, really not.
Lisabet started the week writing about anorexia. It's serious stuff. It's not funny and it's not a compliment. And I really hope people know that. But I'm not sure they do.
We all have the bodies we have. This is me. My physical form is not public property. It's not open to commentary. I don't want to hear what random people think of it. I don't want to be told it's abnormal or ill or doesn't meet someone else's standard of normalcy.
And the funny (not funny) thing is that bodies at both ends of the spectrum seem to face the same kind of public critique. I'm small, but I've overheard a lot of twitter conversations between big women about the hardcore anti-fatness they face from strangers, family members, doctors... the list goes on.
It's not fun when people make assumptions about your mental health or physical well-being based on the size and shape of your body.
That's why I'm especially hurt when pro-fat people choose to turn their contempt on... well, ME. Being pro-fat doesn't have to mean anti-thin. I watched a documentary called Chubby Chaser (it was really unsettling for reasons outside the scope of this post) and at one point the filmmaker attends a BBW convention. The thing that really grabbed my attention was the derogatory attitude many participants held toward thin women.
"Give the girl a sandwich!"
It's unfortunate, because declaring one body type superior to another does nothing to further your cause. Insulting others only exposes an internal discomfort. I realize this happens because popular culture pushes thin so hard, and by all means DO push back, but push at the mentality. Don't push the people.
We've all got better things to do than make value judgements about others based solely on their body size.