Thursday, March 12, 2009

Jury is still out...

By Kim Dare.

I have been, for want of a better word, blessed with a rather British sense of humour. Some times it travels well. Sometimes it just makes anyone from outside the UK wonder what the hell I find so funny.

I suppose when it comes down to it, my sort of sense of humour revolves around sarcasm and a fine appreciation on the absurdity of “normality”.

I like the sort of one liners that will never make anyone roll on the floor laughing, but which just might make someone spray their coffee all over their lap top if they try to read and drink at the same time.

That’s the sort of sense of humour that tends to rub off on my characters – especially the submissives. That’s another thing about the British sense of humour, it only really works if it travels up the ladder rather than down it.

A dominant throwing one liners at a submissive tends to come across as cruel, even if he doesn’t intend to be. While they do get to have their funny and their sarcastic moments, those moments have to be carefully chosen – and the submissives have to find them just as funny as the dominant.

My submissives on the other hand – they can have much more latitude. Sometimes their dominants find the subs sense of humour funny, sometimes they find it endearing. Other times they are more likely to roll their eyes and wonder how the hell they managed to fall in love with such a brat.

Whatever my sense of humour is or isn’t, and regardless of whether or not anyone else finds it funny, I remember reading the submission guidelines of a few well known erotica publishers and finding out that erotic content and humour apparently don’t mix.

They pretty much made it clear that they weren’t interested in anything that might make anyone laugh. I pretty much crossed them off the list of places I was planning to submit to.

Maybe erotic romance is different? Maybe there’s more room for something that had a touch of the romantic comedy about it?

I don’t know. But I am going to find out.

In fact, this month, I may well find out quite a lot about this subject. Two of my stories that I find funny are due to be released over the next couple of weeks. I find them funny. So does my editor judging by the lol’s in the comments during edits :)

But will anyone else find them funny? Will it somehow spoil the story for them if they do?

We shall have to wait and see.

In the meantime, this is one of those jokes that appeals to my sense of humour.

It's not mine, but I wish it was...

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour, surgical procedure.

A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
”Nurse,” he mumbles, from behind the mask. “Are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don't know, sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again. “Nurse, are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around.

After examining them carefully for several minutes, she concludes: “There's nothing wrong with them, Sir!”

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, “Thank you very much, nurse. That was wonderful. But listen very, very closely…

“A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k ?”


Kim Dare.
Kink, love and a happy ending. Do you Dare?


  1. ROFL! OK I just spewed my drink on my computer screen!

  2. OMG! That's hilarious, Kim.

    I wish you all the very best of luck with your upcoming releases. I dunno, if you're creating characters who are alive and feisty, humor is a wonderful way to do it.

    Thanks for the chuckle. No, I didn't sprew coffee... LOL


  3. Good one, LOL

    I think humor can mix just fine with any genre, even erotic romance. Especially erotic romance! There's a lot to find funny, sometimes. A sense of humor helps.

    Best of luck on the releases!

  4. Thanks guys!

    Glad you liked the joke :)

  5. LOL!

    Great nurse joke!

    Best Regards


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