Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Deadly Stinger Squees

I squee over everything. I squee over chicken satays: HOMG, I AM EATING CHICKEN SATAYS. That's me. And though I'm never a part of any particular fandom for very long, I do fannishly squee regularly and with much gusto.

Take recently. I found this:

And I squeed so hard I shattered windows and frightened all the stray cats in the area. The reasons are many fold (I always have many folded reasons as to why I squee) and have a long and varied history.

The obvious, surface reason is that the above is a picture of Murdock from the new A-Team movie. Underneath that surface reason comes the less overt, stranger, underlying reasons for my squee. Like, how much I loved the A-Team as a girl. I wanted to rescue Murdock from a mental asylum, then fly away in his helicopter.

But wait, there's more than plain old nostalgia. Nostalgia on its own cannot a squee make.

I also love the guy playing this new Murdock- Sharlto Copley. He was the guy in District 9, who turned into an alien? Yeah, I love movies about men turning into stuff. Like The Fly, for example- yeah, I would have still fucked Jeff Goldblum when he became half insect.

See? There are layers beneath the squee. Layers of insane reasoning, that cause joy to bubble up through my body and escape out of my mouth.

Another layer is the fact that he's eating in this picture. I could not tell you why I find guys eating sexy. Nor could I tell you why the hat he's wearing in this picture only adds to the overall sexiness. But they do, somehow.

And so the squee is bolstered, by elements of sexiness that I enjoy.

So let's break it down, in scientific or mathmetical terms. Nostalgia + Guy I Like From Elsewhere + Unusually Sexy Action + Weird Hat = Fannish Squee. That seems right, doesn't it? That seems like I've logically considered the whole thing, and turned it into something reasonable, right?

Only it doesn't, and it can't, and squee can never be explained. Sometimes you see a guy chewing summat, and your mouth and vocal chords make a noise, and it's just happened before you knew it was going to. Squees take you by surprise, they leap on you. One second you're being all normal and sane. The next you're jumping on the sofa over chicken satays or Sharlto Copley eating chicken satays or maybe chicken satays slathered over every member of the A-Team.

Who knows, when fannish squees might next strike?


  1. Charlotte - you're a nut, but for some reason, I can't help smiling.

  2. Hopefully because I'm an almond or a cashew. You know, the good kinds of nut.

  3. I never heard of someone being excited - squeed by a hat. That's interesting. Makes me want to check my closet and see what I've got.


  4. Impeccable logic, Charlotte.

    Do you squee over Jeff Goldblum in "Earth Girls Are Easy"? That's one of the sexiest movies I've ever seen (though I'm pretty sure it's rated PG...)

    Thanks for the glimpse into that lovely, twisted mind of yours!


  5. Charlotte,

    Save me a seat for the A-team movie. I grew up watching those shows and I adored them.

    I still weep a little watching Mr T selling the Flavor-Wave oven on the shopping channel (I pity the fool who has to defrost these these steaks).

    Great post.


  6. Garceus- It's the kind of hat he's wearing, I think. The flight hat kind of thing. It symbolises both his expertise in the cockpit, and his total insanity because he's wearing it while trapped in a mental hospital. Or it could just be that I am a crazy person that thinks that kind of hat makes a man look so sexy I can't stand it. Either one.

    Lisabet- You can see I've thought it all out carefully, can't you. And of course I fancy Jeff in EGAE! He's so...deliberate and sensuous. Plus I've got to admit, I'm a sucker for the old "alien man comes to earth and learns our sexy ways" cliche.

    Ashley- Just been to see the movie, and really feel it did it justice. Great cast, lots of silly fun...loved it.


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